“And if it seem evil unto you to serve the LORD, choose you this day whom ye will serve; whether the gods which your fathers served that were on the other side of the flood, or the gods of the Amorites, in whose land ye dwell: but as for me and my house, we will serve the LORD.”(Joshua 24:15)
Knowing man’s need for companionship, God created the first woman, Eve, and placed her at Adam’s side. God opened up Adam’s flesh and from his rib created her. Adam proclaimed, “Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh” (Gen. 2:24). The first family was formed. Before the Tabernacle was made, before the establishment of the church, God instituted the family. Husband and father, wife and mother, and children, these are the threads that comprise a beautiful family. As each family member is blended into the harmony of the whole unit, an amazing picture of God’s grace, love, and mercy emerges. As each member contributes his part and fulfills his role, a miracle of strength is forged.
A marriage is much more than two individuals repeating vows in front of a minister. It is a stage upon which something creative happens, something that only God can perform. When Eve was first brought to Adam, he said, “This is now bone of my bones, and flesh of my flesh: She shall be called Woman, because she was taken out of Man...And they shall be one flesh” (Gen. 2:23-24). These two diverse individuals were melded together into one holy being in the sight of God.
A house may be comprised of brick, mortar, and wood, but the elements that make up a home are love, peace, understanding, security, unity, and trust. The husband of the virtuous woman mentioned in Proverbs 31:11 trusted in her. Trust is necessary for a house to become a home.
Children are truly the greatest of earthly values. They are an extension of the family home, the family influence, and the family’s relationship to God. The psalmist stated that children bring happiness. Bound up in the heart of our children are the things in life that really matter like happiness, fulfillment, security, influence, self-esteem, and strength. Such a blessing are children to a home that Jesus used the character of children to illustrate how adults should conduct themselves in the kingdom of God. (Matthew 18:3-6).
Today we are facing an unstable society that has severely stressed the home. This instability is most obvious in homes where God is absent and, consequently, there are no unifying spiritual principles upon which the family is built. Unfortunately it is not only homes in which God is not included that suffer from these common problems. Many of the same pressures have come to bear on the Christian home as well. Many Christian mothers have also taken jobs outside the home, either by choice or by necessity, and the home often suffers the stress that results from this decision. What a joy it is for the children to come home from school to be greeted by a loving mother who has been busy working and praying to see to it that a clean, comfortable, and godly home awaits them! There they will find peace, harmony, security, and love. No matter how busy they all may be, every family should provide time during each day that the entire family is together. Family roots and harmony are not established and maintained by notes left on the stove or refrigerator door.
FAMILY VALUES
The vast majority of one’s life is spent under the influence of the home. School, church, and jobs affect children in a great way, but all of them combined should not be able to overpower the influence of the home. A child’s value system is fixed at home. The things he loves and hates the things he enjoys and dislike, the things he yields to or resists, these are all established at home.
One of man’s greatest instincts is the desire to belong. The togetherness that a Christian home breeds fulfills this desire. In Psalm 68:6 the psalmist wrote, “God setteth the solitary in families.” God realized the innate human need for a person to belong to something larger than himself. In times of togetherness, families should always include time for prayer. It has been said, “The family that prays together stays together.” How true, and how greatly needed in our church families and world today! The home is like an observation tower where we each learn from one another, not only by what we hear but also by what we see. The home offers parents the greatest opportunity to influence their children for good. The home is God’s greatest university. Every family member is sometimes a student and sometimes the professor.
The foundation of any successful home must include love. Peter admonished the early Christians to have fervent love among themselves (I Peter 4:8). Nowhere should this fervent and unfailing love be more evident than in our homes. The Word of God is filled with instructions as to our relationship with other members of the body of Christ. Often we forget that these same principles apply to our own family as well. We are taught to:
1. Give hospitality one to another without grudging (I Peter 4:9).
2. Be kindly affectionate one to another with brotherly love (Romans 12:10).
3. Honorably prefer one another (Romans 12:10).
4. Be kind one to another (Ephesians 4:32).
FAMILY GOALS
Joshua lifted up a strong standard and goal for his family when he proclaimed, “But as for me and my house, we will serve the LORD.” It is important that a family have definite direction. There are many questions that should be answered. Once the family members have determined their honest needs, they can consider where they want to go from here. And once they have decided their goals, how may they arrive at these goals? Some goals are necessarily long-term goals. Therefore, it is important to set a series of short-term goals that will lead to the ultimate goals.
Planning to retire, mortgages, a big vacation, or purchase a new car is exciting for any family. However, the relationship of the family to Jesus Christ should be the greatest priority. The heart of the home must beat in harmony with the heart of God. This is only accomplished when God’s desires become our desires and we pursue after Him with all diligence. Opportunities abound for a man and woman who are joined together in marriage. They have the opportunity to forge a strong home that is founded on eternal values. They have the opportunity to rear children that will mirror their consecration and bring blessing to the cause of God.
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