HOW TO RIGHT A WRONG

 “So likewise shall my heavenly Father do also unto you if ye from your hearts forgive not everyone his brother their trespasses.” Matthew 18:35

BASIC GOALS AND PRINCIPLES IN RIGHTING A WRONG (Matt. 5:23-24; 6:12, 14-15; 18:15-18, 21-22, 35)

A. Basic Principles:

1. The person who first becomes aware of a wrong has the responsibility to initiate and carry out God’s given procedures in taking care of it till it has reached a satisfactory completion.

2. The time element involved: One ought to proceed as quickly as possible within the framework of God given procedures.

3. If you are not sure what to do, seek the counsel of your pastor.

B. Basic Goals: To restore all relationships in the quickest time possible, while involving as few people as possible.

GOD GIVEN PROCEDURES FOR RIGHTING A WRONG

A. Within The Family Of God: When You Are The Offender.

1) It must be set right with God (Psalm 51:1-4).

a) Confession to God (I John 1:9).

b) Repentance to God (II Cor. 7:9-11).

c) Restitution towards those who have been hurt.

2) It must be set right next with those offended.

a. Confession to the offended.

b. Asking for forgiveness.

1. Wrong Approaches: “I am sorry, but if only you had not...” (Sharing blame), “I am sorry, forgive me.” (Not enough), “If I have been wrong, I’m sorry.”

2. Right Approaches: “I see that I have been wrong in (name basic offence). Will you forgive me?”

3. Important!

a) It is not necessary to get detailed in your confession, just name the basic offence. The devil would want you to confess every thought.

b) The circle of confession should be only as large as the circle of offence.

4) Making satisfactory, necessary restitution.

a) Anything stolen must be returned.

b) Lies told need to be confessed.

c) Gossip, slander, etc., that has hurt relationships and reputations must be rejected.

d) Gratitude for favors received must be given.

e) Rebellion against authority experienced in attitudes and actions must be replaced with submissive spirit and actions.

5) It must be set right with yourself. (Sin always damages you - Psalm 32:1-5)

a) Accept God’s forgiveness and forgive yourself.

b) Seek cleansing from the cause of the sin.

B. When You Are The Offended. You must seek reconciliation with the offender. (Matt. 18:18-35) [Handle the matter the minute it happens, if possible.]

1) Self examination: Examine yourself to see if you have contributed in any way to the wrong that was done. Did you provoke?

2) Prayerful preparation: Prayerfully you must go to the offender with a committed attitude of forgiveness and reconciliation.

3) Wise face to face confrontation: A good approach would be, “Have I done something that has caused you to be angry at me?” (Always give them the benefit of the doubt, and promote an attitude that wants restitution.

4) Finalize the matter. Do not leave until you have done all in your power to consummate the matter by the full restoration of relationship. Pray together.

C. When you are the observing brother (Gal. 6:1; James 5:19-20; Matt. 5:9).

1) Make sure of your own spiritual condition. Galatians 6:1 seems to indicate only “the spiritual” ought to handle this. This means some one who has been walking with the Lord.

2) Approach the party whom you believe is the most likely to initiate God’s procedures; have in mind a procedure to suggest to them.

3) At times it will be appropriate to go with them in the effort, and to participate in the reconciliation.

4) You need to be very careful, and Spirit-led in these procedures. Yet, you cannot avoid your God-given responsibility to be a peacemaker.

D. Outside The Family Of God.

1. When you (the Christian) are the offender. Follow the same procedures as within the family of God.

2. When you are the offended. As the offended, you must forgive without any demand from them. (Matt. 6:12, 14-15; Luke 6:35-37; Romans 12:14-21). 

BLESSED ARE THE PEACEMAKERS

A. There are great advantages in righting wrongs.

1. It humbles a man, a quality necessary for God’s blessings.

2. To seek and to give forgiveness always draws people together.

3. It exalts God, the power to say “I am wrong”, and then to ask forgiveness always exalts God.

4. It results in a good conscience and the destruction of roots that cause habit patterns.

B. Basic truths.

1. It is possible to genuinely love someone, and still be bitter and resentful. This builds walls between people without them realizing it.

2. Forgiveness is not a feeling, but an act of obedience. You must get things right, even if it hurts.

3. The way you react when hurt; can help determine what your basic root problem is.

a) Anger, revenge, bitterness.

b) Self pity and withdrawal.

c) Fear of rejection and failure.

“THE BROKEN RELATIONSHIPS OF THE PRESENT GO BACK TO THE UNHEALED HURTS OF THE PAST”