Matthew
9:3-8, I Corinthians 7:2, Ephesians 5:22-23
What in the Bible makes people think that God approves
of polygamy? There is a dangerous assumption which
accompanies many Bible readers and serves as the root of numerous stumbling
blocks. It’s the false assumption Scripture condones all behavior recorded in
the historical narratives of the Bible, especially if God’s disapproval is not
explicitly expressed in the immediate context of the behaviors in question. God
allowed David and Solomon to have many wives (I Kings 11:3), but allowance is
not the same as approval.
We should not assume that everything done by a godly
person in the Bible is automatically approved of by God. The Bible is unique
amongst ancient documents in that it presents its heroes as very “human.”
David, Solomon, Samuel, Abraham, Sarah, Moses, and others are presented as
sinners who, in some cases, committed horrible mistakes. We must look to
specific Bible commands and principles, not to individual stories to determine
what right behavior is. Genesis 2:24, 25 imply that it was God’s plan all
along for one husband to have one wife. In Matthew 19:9, Jesus strongly supports
monogamy.
It is very important that we stop viewing the Bible
as a rule book. It is not a manual, but a story. It is the story of mankind’s
fall from grace and God’s plan to redeem the world. The “rules” the Bible gives
us are about the role we play in that redemption.
Studying the Mosaic Law is important for
understanding the historical accounts recorded. When God gave Moses the Law, He
established the moral and societal parameters within which He expected the
nation of Israel to live. When we have a grasp on the Law, we will have the
standard by which we are to discern the behavior of the people recorded. God
told the Israelites when they selected a king, he was not to have multiple
wives (Deuteronomy 17:17). As the Apostle Paul says, the Law served to reveal
our sin and shut all people up under sin (Galatians 3:19-22).
Why did God allow men to have more than one wife?
The Bible doesn’t specifically say why, so we have to take Biblical principles
and extrapolate something elsewhere and apply it to this situation. We cannot
assume that all the actions recorded by even the most righteous people in the
Bible are condoned by God. We cannot assume that God will always solve such a
conundrum for us because often the purpose of the passage was not to teach
about the ethics of the situation. In many cases, the Bible presents the facts
of history and leaves us to interpret these facts. In such cases, it is up to
us to apply biblical principles and common sense to understand the moral implications
of the actions of Bible characters.
David was king during a time when there would have
been pressure to get married for political reasons. Did God approve of this?
No, but he worked within the framework of David’s world and he extended grace
to David. Just because polygamy is in the Bible doesn’t mean that God endorses
it. God didn’t necessarily punish polygamy, but he didn’t bless it either. There
is no example in scripture that a man was blessed because of his polygamy.
There was a price to pay for living in polygamy. Every time multiple marriages
happen in scripture, strife occurred. God’s grace works in mysterious ways. It
was never God’s will for a man to have multiple wives. God’s decree is clear in
Genesis 2:24.
Solomon was not struck down for multiple wives. He
was struck down for allowing his foreign wives to erect idols to their gods
alluding to equal standing to God. God allowed Solomon to make the choice to
disobey, but Solomon’s choice brought inevitable consequences (I kings 11:11).
Why does God allow anything that people do that is
sinful? He allows it because he gave us free will. This is often seen as the
cop-out answer anytime the question of why God allows evil in the world. For
people seeking the truth in earnest, it would be disingenuous to ignore any of
the relevant factors revealed in Scripture pertaining to this question. David,
like all other human beings, was not a robot. He had the capacity to make
choices which either adhered to God’s Word or blatantly disobeyed it. It is
never God’s will that anyone sin, but He does allow us to make our own choices.
Free will is a tremendous gift given to us by God
because it enables our actions to have meaning and purpose; however, we can
abuse it to do unspeakable things in pursuit of our selfish ambitions. When it
comes to God’s children, Scripture places much emphasis on the importance of
making good decisions (Joshua 24:14-15; I Corinthians 10:13). David clearly
struggled with this many times. While reading through David’s life, it is
evident he did not always make good decisions. In all of Scripture, the life of
David may be the most dramatic recorded. No other account in the Bible so
vividly captures the heart-wrenching struggle of a sinful man who earnestly
sought after the Lord yet failed to measure up.
God does not execute judgment against every sin the
moment it is committed, because if he did the human race would be extinct
within a matter of minutes. Punishment is built into sin, there are always
inevitable consequences. God is gracious, merciful, and long-suffering with people
who don’t deserve it. God gives us commandments to guide us so we can be
blessed. God patiently works with sinful people who live in a sinful world. God
stoops to our level and works with us despite our flaws.
God’s providence is one of the most glorious and mind-blowing truths
Scripture reveals about Him. God exercises His power in harmony with our free
will (even our sinful decisions) to accomplish His divine purposes. God makes
the ultimate mockery of sin by taking our wicked decisions and using them for
His good purposes (Genesis 50:20; Romans 8:28). That is not to say it is a good
thing when we sin. Rather, God works through the effects of our sin to bring
about His purposes, though He still abhors our sinful actions. He will always
accomplish exactly what He intends.
Sin includes actions taken or behaviors
that fall outside the will of God, so from that perspective polygamy is a
sinful act that God works for His glory and man’s good.
For example, Bathsheba bore Solomon to David, and he was part of Jesus’
genealogy (Matthew 1:6-7). Also, the heinous sin David committed with Bathsheba
resulted in David writing Psalm 51, which has long been a refuge for all
believers when they have given in to sin and need to repent.
Why did God allow polygamy in the Old Testament? The Bible does not
specifically say why God allowed polygamy. As we speculate about God’s silence,
there is at least one key factor to consider. Due to patriarchal societies, it
was nearly impossible for an unmarried woman to provide for herself. Women were
often uneducated and untrained. Women relied on their fathers, brothers, and
husbands for provision and protection. Unmarried women were often subjected to
prostitution and slavery.
So, it seems that God may have allowed polygamy to protect and provide
for the women who could not find a husband otherwise. A man would take multiple
wives and serve as the provider and protector of all of them. While definitely
not ideal, living in a polygamist household was far better than the
alternatives: prostitution, slavery, or starvation. In addition to the
protection/provision factor, polygamy enabled a much faster expansion of
humanity, fulfilling God’s command to “be fruitful and increase in number;
multiply on the earth” (Genesis 9:7).
Why did it change? It is not so much God’s disallowing something He previously allowed as it is God’s restoring marriage to His original plan (Matt. 19:8). Even going back to Adam and Eve, polygamy was not God’s original intent (Genesis 2:24). God seems to have allowed polygamy to solve a problem, but it is not the ideal. The Bible presents monogamy as the plan that conforms most closely to God’s ideal for marriage.
God did allow divorce in the Old Testament, but it wasn’t because divorce was something He approved of. Rather, it was something He allowed because man’s hearts were hard. They were still slaves to sin and the flesh. Obviously, after the fall, God made a temporary adjustment to the system of marriage because humans were incapable of the monogamous lifelong coupling He intended at the beginning. We can apply these same criteria to polygamy.
It wouldn’t be the first time God amended his
original intent due to the hardness of people’s hearts. Remember, it was never
His intention for anyone but Him to rule over the Israelites (1 Samuel 8:4-22).
But due to the hardness of their hearts, God allowed them to have a human king
to rule over them.
In Deuteronomy 17:17, God says that the kings
were not supposed to multiply wives. Therefore, why did God give David the
wives of Saul? The answer can be found II Samuel 12:8 where we are
informed that God gave David all of Saul’s possessions: Saul’s house, his wives,
and the kingdom. He gave David Saul’s wife to care for. It is important to know
that the Hebrew word for “care” is rarely used in the Old Testament to refer to
sexual intercourse. Scripture does not support the conclusion that David
actually married any of Saul’s wives nor had children by them. What is clear is
that God gave to David Saul’s widows for the purpose of providing
financial support and care for them.
The Bible mentions that David and Solomon had
concubines. In the Old Testament, a concubine was different than the modern day
concubine. In the Old Testament, a concubine was legally a second-class wife
(Judges 19:1-5). A concubine was not a kept mistress and did not cohabit with a
man unless married to him. Today’s definition of a concubine is a
mistress, a woman who is not married to a man and provides him sexual activity.
God recorded David’s polygamous lifestyle for our
instruction and encouragement. In his epistle to the Romans, Paul mentions the
edifying nature of the entire Old Testament stating, “For whatever was
written in earlier times was written for our instruction so that through
perseverance and the encouragement of the Scripture we might have
hope” (Romans 15:4). Regarding David’s and Solomon’s wives, we have a grim
reminder of what happens when we neglect to live as God commands. Their family
life was by far their biggest failure. The complex families they had were the
source of much sorrow and strife. We can learn much from their mistakes. Also,
we find hope. If God remained faithful to David and Solomon in spite of their
failings, we can rest assured He will remain faithful to us despite ours.
So, to bring this back around to the original
question of where the Bible says a man can marry multiple wives, the answer is
that it says no such thing. More importantly, though, the Bible says that we
ought to seek the Kingdom of God first, and God’s Kingdom is one in which a man
leaves his father and mother, clings to his wife, and they become one. This is
the blueprint we are to follow.
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